Who gives a shit about your opinion? No one – that’s who!
I’ll say this, and then continue on with my rant. I do not condone public tongue lashings on the web, Internet, blog-o-sphere, social media realm, or whatever you choose to term it; but I am about to chew someone a new asshole, and they well deserve it. This is my personal blog, it is for expressing my personal opinions, likes, dislikes, and basically whatever I feel like saying. It has nothing to do with my writing, or any of my business associations, nor is it in any way shape or form directed at one of my business associates. That having been fully stated, I’d like to convey my most sincere wish that the individual in question feel free to take this attack personally, and if there is any justice to be had in this world, fucking choke on it!
What’s gnawing at my ass tonight? An individual out there who loves to expound upon their personal opinions as if they were actual facts, God’s lips to their ears…and all that crap. Guess what dipshit, you’re opinions are not fact! They are the somewhat less than lucid rambling of a pedantic twit that just stepped on the wrong set of toes. Allow me to paraphrase this individual’s professional advice: all writers should do THIS; no writer should ever do THAT; you’ll never make big it if you don’t XY&Z, and my personal favorite – you know, the piece wasn’t really all that good. Fuck you! Fuck your opinions! And (forgive the poor grammar here – never start a sentence with ‘and’ if avoidable), fuck the high horse you’re sitting on that I cannot wait to see you plummet from! Why should something I’d normally laugh at piss me off so severely? Because the troglodyte in question happened to have chosen an individual I am acquainted with to not only covertly attack, but attempt to subtly destroy in the process.
First off, you never know who is listening on the Internet – so keep your fucking trap shut. Second, your opinion does not make for fact. As a matter of fact, it’s usually a complete load of shit derived from your own personal, and bitterly disappointing experiences; so spare the rest of us the gory and useless details. Stop with the fucking whining about how to do it right; get off your fucking ass and give it an actual try. Nothing pisses me off more than a pompous little prick who has all the answers, when they still haven’t learned how to read the question. Let me help you out and share a clue with you — if you had the fucking answers, you wouldn’t be the little prick, you’d be the big one – so stop running your fucking mouth and get a god damn life where you don’t need to hide behind a computer to tell the rest of the world how friggin’ wonderful you are. Show us, lead by example, I most humbly await your guidance.
No, too scared? Afraid the prattle that dribbles from your feeble attempt at neural processing might actually be true? Fear not moron! You are completely safe. Your opinions are as shit as the way in which you choose to convey them to the world. Is this post eloquent? Fuck no! Is it meant to let you know that I, speaking on behalf of a probable large and mostly silent majority, are fucking sick and tired of listening to you pump yourself up with imaginary success, and offering advice that is killing the careers of some very talented people? Yes! Hey, you might have actually figured that out for yourself by now, though the likely hood is slim to none.
Never let it be said that I didn’t offer a neophyte a running start.
Just in case you didn’t get the message; let me make it emphatically clear – SHUT THE FUCK UP! If this goes to round two, you are going to wish your own mother had choked the life out of you at birth. I shit you not!
For anyone who read to the end of this post who was not intended to be put-off by my somewhat restrained outburst, I apologize if you’ve been offended or find yourself wondering why the Nina you are accustomed to hearing from doesn’t seem to be here at the moment.